It's broken.

I do a lot of thinking don't I? It seems like I always get these random thoughts whenever and wherever I might be. I stayed up crying last night after two fights with my mom and my sister. Nothing special really, it was just another one of those family feuds. I swear we fight over the dumbest things. Then again, I should have seen it coming because I've been on the verge of crying throughout the whole of last week (more like the whole of last month). I let it all out last night, and I feel a lot better.

Last week was the last week of term; we get a two week break from school... more like a two week non-stop study marathon. It seems that each of the teachers' are all reminding us that their subjects are more important than the others. Sigh so which one do you prioritize? The subjects I'm taking for AS levels are a handful. Though Accounting and Business seem to be less stressful for me because I know the basics and my foundation of the subjects are primarily strong. Physics, Math and General studies however are beyond my knowledge. I'm trying hard to remember why I'm taking Physics in the first place. General studies, as a subject, won't even be recognized by some universities in London because it's still quite new. Maths, most of the things we're studying now are quite new to me. I was seriously lucky to get that A grade for my Module Pure Maths 1.

I've been trying to get online for the past hour. I promised Rez I'd come online at eight and now its almost half past. I finally saw him online this afternoon while I was hanging out at Adeline's house. My god, I've missed him so much. lol two months to go Rez babe =)

The student council announcements were last week. Sadly enough (and I've got tears and a stab in my heart to prove it), I didn't get any position in the council whatsoever. I cried in the gym right after the announcements sigh. But I'm proud to say that my best friend, Aimi, is now the head girl of JIS. I'm so bloody proud of her. I mean, it was expected but wow, the shock in her face when they announced her name. =) Sigh. Congratulations to the new House Captains of all houses.. especially Green; Michelle Wong and Shahyzul Rahman.. even though it was the position I seriously wanted. I guess you two deserve it more than I ever will. Yes, I'm envious. Yes, I was upset. I don't think I'll get over it for a while, but as for now I guess I'll cope. That's life right? You win some.. and you lose some.

My birthday is in exactly two weeks from today =) I'm looking forward to it because I'll be turning seventeen.. hey! the quicker it gets here, the sooner I'll be eighteen and the sooner it will be until I go abroad to a foreign country to continue with my further studies. So I'm happy. However, my birthday will also be the first day back to school, hei~ I wonder what I'm going to do on that day.

Sometimes I find it hard to breathe when I think back. My mom says I'm strong.. and I know it takes time to let go. I'm still not ready to because little things take a lot of time. I've always wanted to forget and sometimes wished that I could turn back time. I've always wondered how my boyfriend can cope with me with my always changing moods. I guess he's grown used to it because its normal for me to be so indecisive. I'm still growing up. I pierced my left ear last week, lol. Now I have two piercings on my left ear and one on my right. I've been meaning to get another one soon. I don't know what posessed me to get one that day. I guess I was that frustrated about how things were going.

I've been having misunderstandings with Juls, sigh. We're okay now, happier than ever. It was our four month anniversary last weekend =) We had dinner at Fratini's and watched Gothika at The Mall. We've been having misunderstandings every now and then, ending up with me being really upset. I get upset over the dumbest things, well.. they're not really that dumb because I have a right to be upset over what has happened and what's been said. So never mind, I take back what I said.

I've got tons of things to get done this week, errands here and there. I've been catching up with my sleep and my eye bags aren't as bad as they used to be when school started (I wonder who's fault that is? heheh *ahem*). I've always wanted to go to bed at nine, but everytime I feel like going to bed.. my boyfriend says to me, "the night is still young". lol, can you blame him? He's a great guy, he seriously is. He goes to bed at the weirdest hours, like say four or five am and wakes up in time for lunch. So you can guess in the morning that he's half dead while I'm always perky in the am. lol, but lately it's the other way round because.. well, I've been sleeping late (11pm is late to me okay? bed time is at 9pm). He, on the other hand, sleeps earlier (11pm is early to him), and wakes up the morning feeling fresh =P Sigh but he's such a doll. He has no idea how adorable he is. He's got the cutest face, and the most darling eyes haha yes, I've been totally smitten by this cartoon character. He wrote me a letter the other day, I know now that he will go (and has gone) through endless lengths to make me happy. I don't know whatever made me think that he was going to dump me after a month of going out togehter..haha =) i love you luv =)

I bought the orange-est bag while I was in KL, lol. It's noticable and its bright. I can be known as the girl with the orange bag.. sigh It's been over an hour since I've been trying to connect.. and I still haven't. GEEZ. It keeps telling me that there's no dial tone. Whatever that means. My phone line is screwy. ARGH.